The Positive Side of Pain
One of the things that will inevitably occur when learning to manage one's ADHD is encountering pain. The ADHD brain is not a neurotypical brain, and the world was made for neurotypical brains. This leads to the struggles ADHDers face on a daily basis.
It is almost certain you have already come face to face with ADHD-related pain. Think back. There have been many times where you have faced difficulty, been yelled at, been made fun of, felt different, felt misunderstood, or have otherwise had a negative emotional experience because of your ADHD symptoms. Sometimes, it is not even things we can easily remember. In learning more about ADHD, it is quite common for painful memories you thought you had forgotten to resurface. These are, perhaps, the most painful memories of all, for these are the memories we have tried to forget. They remind us of the times we have been rejected or failed.
Many people with ADHD have been rejected in their lives. Even if they have developed a positive social life, ADHDers can be prone to looking back and dwelling on memories of times they have been rejected by those they hoped would love them or even just be their friend. The bad memories are outweighed by whatever progress has been made in their social life.
These rejections are not based on anything that is wrong with the ADHDers. Rather, they do not have the same brain wiring that everyone else has. This difference can lead to a variety of factors that lead to rejection. People misunderstand ADHD and its behaviors, or they simply are not willing to tolerate the eccentricities a person with ADHD has.
The memories of failure are particularly nasty because you are reliving past pains. You failed. You felt pain. And then, you remember the failure, causing you to feel the pain all over again.
Memories of failure are annoying because you do not have to remember them to feel pain. They are painful of their own accord. You tried something, hoping you would be successful, and it did not work out. You would rather not think about it, but alas, memories are pesky little buggers.
Rejection and failure can be awful, but they do not have to ruin a person's life. Rejection from others can lead to compassion in the ADHDer. If a person with ADHD examines why they were hurt by a rejection, it can lead to them extending compassion to someone else. They can also learn to tolerate the eccentricities of others because they know how it hurts to have their own eccentricities rejected.
It is in trying again after failure (even if it is the 29th failure in a row) that growth occurs. You have learned from your mistakes. If you have failed 28 times in a row, perhaps, the 29th time will be successful. This is the essential strategy behind Reset ADHD's mission. When something does not go the way you want and you hit the reset button on your ADHD, you try again, trying a new strategy that you hope will help you achieve your goal.
The Positive Side
Oftentimes, I feel like society tries to avoid pain at all costs, but I offer a new perspective: There is a positive side to pain. In fact, pain and suffering can lead to good things if you try to find growth through your sorrows. Life with ADHD can suck, but it does not have to destroy you. With the right attitude (and sometimes time), the disappointing parts of life can lead better things in the future.