Life with an ADHDer is not always easy, but it is rarely boring. I was reflecting recently about all of the ADHD things I do that will one affect my future wife. I have compiled this list in the hopes that it might inspire you to warn your future spouse about life with you. If you are already married, feel free to enjoy the craziness that follows.

One of my least favorite ADHD stereotypes is the “SQUIRREL!” one. We ADHDers don’t go around yelling, “SQUIRREL!” every time we see a squirrel. That’s not a thing.

One day, during my Freshman year of high school, one of my teachers pointed out in front of the class that I had a weird sense of humor. “Yeah, but I’m not the only one,” I responded.

He doubled down. “Yeah, but yours is way out there.” At that moment, the conversation went from playful to isolating. I acknowledged that I had a bizarre sense of humor, but he went further and made me feel different. And, this teacher was a family friend! My sense of humor started to become a source of shame. I tried to hide the more bizarre side of my sense of humor, only sharing the humorous side that I knew others would appreciate.

One reason parents are often resistant to getting their child tested for ADHD is the fear that their child will be given a label. This is tragic. The ADHD label is not something to be feared. It is not a negative. Yes, there are struggles that come with ADHD, but the label itself does not doom an individual. On the contrary, seeking an ADHD diagnosis can be beneficial.

We all have stories about our lives. There are good stories and bad stories. But, what determines whether or not a story is good or bad? We do. We have the choice to make a story good or bad. The stories in our past that we view as negative, perhaps, just need to be seen in a different light.

I was once catching up with an acquaintance I had not seen in a long time, and it came up in conversation that I have ADHD. She had never known that about me and had never really had ADHD explained to her before. She asked, “ So, what is that like fo you? Like, how does that feel?” I hesitated and did not really know what to say. Of course, I know what it is like to have ADHD. I have it; I know what it is like. But, when it comes to explaining it, especially to someone who has no concept of what it is like, it is incredibly difficult. Furthermore, I do not know what normal is. How do I even know I am covering everything? Even though I have been diagnosed with ADHD for over 5 years, I am still finding out new things about ADHD that make me go, “Oh," that is why I do that weird thing!”